A Derailed Post: I hate being female sometimes.

I've got loose plans with a friend to jam over winter break. I suggested it because she now has a car and I have a bass and piano [which she plays] at my house. Looking over my twenty second video two main errors stand out: my horrid tempo and that I need to stick to the plan in my head. The planing isn't that important for jamming but my timing will be since my friend has dabbled in everything but drums. I'm worried for nothing really, my friend has been playing forever, and I feel like a too old greenhorn. I've been wondering about jamming for awhile now, but those sickening questions of when will I join a band come bubbling back up. I know I'm not good enough for that,  hell the idea of having any kind of interdependent relationship scares me more then being on stage. I wish I knew what I wanted out of all this, I wish I could just be content being a bedroom bassist.

I wish the prospect of the unknown wasn't so exciting.